Lord, I Want to Serve You...But Is This How?

"I'm hungry, Mom" The words of a desperate 4 year old confusing hunger with boredom, yet again, and for the second time that day, as a matter of fact. I respond with, "Have a carrot." And of course the battle begins. "No, I want fruit snacks. Actually, can I have more pretzels?" Seriously? How many pretzels could really fit inside that tiny stomach? So, I continue to answer back with a "no" and explain to her that if she's really hungry, she'll take what I give her even if she's not jumping for joy over it. And I solidify my answer by reminding her that I know what's best for her as her mother. "You need vitamins from fruits and veggies. Pretzels do not have everything you need to be healthy and strong." Needless to say, she did not win the battle...in our house, there's no negotiating with terrorize-ers...or is it terrorists?? Same thing. ;-) OK, bear with me. I'm going somewhere with this.

In the past I've prayed, "Lord, show me how to serve you. Show me how I can be a light in this dark world." Then, He answers that prayer and plops some situation right in my lap. God is gracious, is He not?? I recognize this gift as a blessing. An answered pray. I start off strong with zest and zeal. Then, as the days and weeks pass, doubt, frustrations, complications,-- and other "tion" words that don't have positive connotations--start to creep in! And instead of taking time out to pray about each one of these "setbacks" and ask God for His direction in them as they arise, I retract and run for the hills. NOT smart!

How could I doubt what was first perceived as answered prayer? How could I think God doesn't know first what's best for me? 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 says:

The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Take EVERY thought captive and make it obedient to Christ! Why? Because God says so! Because our thoughts and feeling are not our own and we can easily be swayed by them, so the Lord gives us His Word that warns us of this and tells us how to battle against it. In the context of serving our Lord, we may want to serve but then doubt and discouragement tell us otherwise when an opportunity arises. Do doubt and discouragement come from the Lord? NOPE! That kinda stuff comes straight from the Enemy! Sneaky, sneaky. Take them captive and make them obedient to Christ! Amen!!

You see, regarding the example with my daughter, she felt like she was "hungry". What I wanted her to eat wasn't to her liking so she complained, grumbled, tried to negotiate, etc. Don't we do this with our Heavenly Father? We're hungry to serve Him, so we ask how we can satisfy this hunger to serve. When He gives us the chance to serve Him in a way He sees fit, we complain, we grumble, we try to negotiate (all things UN-godly) and we try to put the stops on what should be acknowledged as answered prayer. We ask God for "food". He asks us "Are you really hungry? Because if you are, you'll take what I give you". Hmmm...chew on that for a minute. Pun most definitely intended!

Our Heavenly Father LOVES us. We are His children. We HAVE to trust Him. The Christian life is not an easy one. Jesus made that perfectly clear to us! It's not the path of least resistance. It is a path of TOTAL resistance. From others around us, from our own flesh, and from the Enemy, of course. So again, endure. The Lord is our only provider of strength in times of doubt and discouragement.

Lord, thank you for giving me things I think I'm not cut out for. Lord, help me to be courageous in these situations. Help me to endure. Help me to take captive these doubts and to wait for direction from You in all things. Lord, I hope you clearly open and close doors in my life so I'm not left in question but in confidence that you have plans for me. I love you God and know you want only what's best for me. I want to serve you in any way YOU see fit, just as your son, Jesus Christ served us with perfection. It's in His name we pray.

Amen

Our Spiritual Tool Box

I was reading my devotional and came across a verse that shouted out to me so loudly that I had to put pen to paper (which takes a LOT of effort for me at 5:30 in the morning!). 2 Peter 1:5-8 reads, "For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ." Wow! That was a GIANT "Aha!" moment for me.

I can remember growing up at Christmas time and we would drive out to my Grandparents in upstate NY to open gifts together and of course, stuff our faces with food (How else were we gonna stay warm in the middle of winter in upstate NY)! It's funny, it's not my gifts I remember the most but my father's gifts that stuck in my mind. Every year my grandfather would give my dad a new tool for his tool box. The latest and the greatest with all the bells and whistles. I never understood it but my grandfather was intent on stocking up my dads tool box. He'd get a big smile on his face (which is rare for my Italian, mafia-looking Grandpa) when my dad would open his gift then resume the serious, Godfather look shortly after. This memory came rushing back to me when I read the verse from 2 Peter because maybe our heavenly Father does the same with each one of us (minus the somber Soprano demeanor). God has a spiritual toolbox for each one of us. We might get different models of different tools but something tells me (actually, 2 Peter 1:5-8 tells me) He gets us the ones with all the bells and whistles!

By grace we are saved and by faith we believe. The apostle Peter lists out for us the tools that will help us add to that faith. Why? Because he wanted us to build a wall around our hearts with these tools. To guard our hearts against false teaching. Against a shaky foundation. Against the Enemy. Goodness, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness, love. God gave us these tools when he poured out his love for us on the cross. It is through His son, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, that these tools were made available in our spiritual tool box, so to speak. It is then our responsibility as a believer to take these tools and build a wall against the Enemy and at the same time build a strong foundation to (and here's the kicker) CONTINUE building on. "For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive..."(2 Peter 1:8). How do we increase the measure of these qualities? We use them! Do our muscles not atrophy if we just sit there and do nothing with them?

My dad could have packed away each one of those tools, said, "Thanks, Pops!", and never broke them out again. They would just sit there. Creating nothing. Being ineffective. Unproductive. Or he could have looked at each one as an opportunity to build something strong. Something long lasting. Something that would demonstrate the awesome power of that tool.

So, what are you building with your tools? Are you building a wall around your heart to protect you from the enemy and his tricks? Are you building one another up? Are you building anything to show the AWESOME power of the tool and the One that gave it to you. Are you in the Word? Are you reading the Instruction Manual for your tools? Maybe you need to start there if you're not sure how to use your tools yet...and that's OK. But know that God gave them to you and He's crackin' a smile EVERY time you take them out to use them!

Lord, today I pray your Word will reach down far in our hearts. That it will dig down past the tough skin this world has put around our hearts. I pray you will show us how to use these amazing tools that are begging to be used for some good. For Your glory. I pray that you will allow us victories in using your tools, that you've so graciously given to us. Thank you, Lord for giving us the opportunity to show the world what you've given us. 

Amen